Feeling Trapped

I am going crazy!  I hate the feeling of being trapped or not being able to go somewhere. 

We live on a highway and it's closed like completely closed. The last time they were working on this highway north of us they just shut it down to one lane but here they've closed the whole thing. We have only one way out and it is the shoulder and right now the shoulder has huge ruts in it, its wet and my van barely makes it through. We can't go south of our house on the shoulder because it's too narrow and there are mail boxes in the way. And it's been like this since Tuesday. We have to go to the post office to pick up our mail and we pretty much can't have any visitors. They would rather we walk the 1/2 mile from the side road but I am not sure that would be possible with the girls or with any amount of groceries and around all their equipment makes me nervous!

I might not be as frustrated if I would have had notification, maybe a little bit of information of hey were closing your road and you won't be able to leave your house but NOTHING!

Grrr I know this will pass but right now all I want is it to be over SOON!!

Completely Guilty of Yelling

This article was perfect, exactly what I needed to hear. Maybe it's because at some point I think every mom has been there and I think every mom can relate and I think this is especially true for these little years the years between 2-6.
www.handsfreemama.com/2013/05/22/the-important-thing-about-yelling/

I have felt this especially over the last month. I am yelling more, WAY more and I don't like it! I don't feel any better after I yell, lets be honest my children's behavior doesn't change because I yelled and I just feel angry...A lot! I try to keep my yelling to behind closed doors because I don't want to be "that" mom the one who is yelling at their kid in wal mart or at the park or wherever you may be at. I don't want to be that and we all know and have seen it before. We have all thought to ourselves at one time or another. ..wow that mom is out of control.

    But it doesn't really matter does it whether your yelling behind the closed doors of your home or as soon as the van door closes shut, its still yelling public or not.... Your children hear, your spouse hears, and most of all God hears.

   As a strong willed child I didn't like being yelled at and in fact probably if you yell at me I will take on the challenge to make you more mad (ok that's not right either but I am being honest here). So why do I continue to yell at my own children and expect different results then what I would do? After all I am half their main role model. The person they look to when they are wondering how to act. So do I want to raise children that yell?! Absolutely Not!!

I am trying to commit to reducing the stress I can in my life. Decrease the use of my smart phone, and enjoy these little years....because as we've all been told THEY GO BY WAY TOO FAST!!!

   Praying to give my children some grace and let God work in my heart to be a good example of Christ to my beautiful daughters...because they deserve the best from me!

Colossians 3:21 Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discourged.

Out with the old in with the "New"

The warm weather has finally arrived and it looks like it is staying around!  So its that time of year to put away the winter clothes and bring in the summer clothes. 

Today I am thankful that we made one of our bedrooms a laundry room!! Its big and I have lots of room for all those totes and able to organize. Otherwise this is one of my least favorite tasks as a mom and if I was still stuck in the old basement doing this it probably wouldn't get done. We would probably just continue to live out of totes.

I am trying really hard to keep the laundry to a minimum so that Brandon won't have a ton to do while I am gone. (Or I won't have a TON to do when I get back) So this week has been spent washing, drying,  folding, and repeat. 

A tote for 5t winter, a tote for 4t winter and a tote of mostly random too small for anyone to wear next winter. Blakely is my chunk-a-munk who went from wearing 2t at the beginning of winter to 3t and on to 4t. I keep thinking all this running away out to the barn is going to thin her out but Hey the girl LOVES to eat!

I am also thankful my sister was able to get some awesome deals at garage sales this spring for Teagan and now we are all ready for SUMMER!!

Now if I can find someone to take all these totes back to the dungeon......

Keeping Memories

My mom has the amazing ability to keep stuff. Not like a hoarder or anything but she has kept a lot of our toys and books from childhood.  When ever we go to my parents the girls love to play with my old toys and find the books that say my name in them and either Teagan will try to read it or they will want Grandma to read it to them.

It's really a lot of fun for me and it takes me back down memory lane. I enjoy seeing the girls find excitement and joy playing with toys I once found that same excitement and joy in.

My mom has each box nicely organized and placed in the attic.  They aren't dirty and they also aren't just stacked clutter all over the house. Oh and it's not like she kept every toy....or at least I don't think she did ;) But she kept the one's we loved the one's I remember and I can't think of any toy that she didn't keep because I must not of felt any attachment to them.

Now here I sit as a mom of 3 girls overwhelmed with the amounts of totes we have! Personally I would love to just get rid of all of it. If we haven't opened it in the last year why keep it??!! The only reason I have kept stuff so far is in case we have another baby some day. But even then I have no desire to dig through them to find my favorites or to get stuff out if we do ever have another one. Honestly it would just be easier to go to the store and buy new.

But that's the country we live in we are a throw away country.  We want the next new thing and we don't want the old. We are never satisfied with what we have. If it's broke we won't fix it and if it's not broke we try to fix it (doesn't make sense does it??) And ok I just went off on a tangent there that's not really what this post is about :) lol

So back to keeping memories.  I have brought down all the totes that were stored upstairs that are completely covered in construction dust and we're digging through them today. The girls are going down memory lane (that whole 5 years ;) and remembering playing with certain toys and who gave it to them and what they love about it. Oh and why we SHOULD or HAVE to keep it.

So the question is how do you decide? 

While I really want to just give it all away a keep none of it, I also want my grandkids to have that joy and excitement of playing with their Mommy's toys....just like my girls do here...............

Enjoying the Sweet spot

This morning we got outside before it got too hot. May 14th and it's close to 100 degrees outside. Didn't we just have snow 10 days ago?? Crazy weather!!!

So today we went to Wilder Park in Allison and I love that park it's the perfect park. It has a pond so you can throw rocks or go fishing,  it has a playground,  it has walking/biking trails, and different games you can play. The girls love it too and there is enough to do that they for sure don't get bored!

It was the perfect morning and then Brandon met us for lunch. It is only about half a mile from his office.  It was one of those days that Brandon would say this is the "sweet spot". It was beautiful out, the girls were getting along, our dog Rudy was enjoying the sun and then......

Harper falls in the pond.

As Harper tells the story she "nearly drowned and Teagan saved her life". Lol it wasn't quite like that.  Although Teagan was a nice big sister and helped her up they were in a spot that the water wouldn't even come up to her knees but she did get pretty wet and fortunately it was warm enough out she dried off quickly.

We still enjoyed the day and now were home trying to stay cool without turning the air on.....because it's May.....and I refuse to turn on my air conditioning in May!! My electric bill needs a break!

Hope everyone else is staying cool and finally able to get outside and enjoy all things fun like flip flops and sun!

Family Church

So Brandon and I had this genius idea about a month ago (well actually it was just me but Brandon has helped implement the idea :) So I thought I would share it with everyone.

We moved to Parkersburg almost 4 years ago and we started attending our church at that time too. Our church encourages children to stay in the service and worship as a family. The concept really makes sense to me and I get it but I got to be honest up until a month ago I hated it!! Sometimes there would be a nursery during 2nd service but not always and Teagan and Harper are now both older then 3 so technically they aren't supposed to be in the nursery anyways so we just decided they would stay in the service with us.

For the last 4 years we have been trying all kinds of things.  Snacks, suckers, gum, books, toys, the church "quiet" bag, etc.  They all have left me wanting to scream by the end of church. I felt like the whole service was spent trying to keep my kids quiet and I leave unfilled and have got nothing out of being in the service other then stress and wondering why my kids don't behave or listen. Envious of the parents whose children just quietly sit there perfectly and just plain annoyed.

That was all until my genius idea I had a month ago and I am a little bit afraid to share it with you as it might jinx me. This is what has worked for is the last 4 Sunday's.....

This is what we have finally found works!!!

We give them............

NOTHING

Yep that's right nothing (Genius right??!)

I wish I would have thought of this brilliant idea 4 years ago! The last 4 Sunday's I have left church feeling peace,  and calm and not stressed out. I have been proud of all 3 of my daughters quietly sitting in church not distracted by which crayon they want or which toy fell under the pew, or why does she have more of a snack then I do?

I have actually been able to listen to the sermons!  Amazing huh?!

Now as I think back all this is kind of my fault. All those stressful Sunday's of thinking my children needed some sort of activity to keep them busy and occupied. I am the one who thought they needed all of those things. When in reality they don't need anything!  Sometimes more stuff actually just becomes a distraction. I think we can learn a lot from this. We need to simplify other areas of our lives too.
One blog that has really inspired me to simplify our lives is:
www.livingwellspendingless.com and she writes a blog entry on why she took her kids toys away. She is a much better writer then me!

Disclaimer: this idea might not work for everyone and my children are by no means perfect in church now. They are still kids we have still had to step out to the bathroom a time or two (which everyone knows can never be good ;)
But we are learning as a family what works for us and this has decreased stress and distractions for us!

Mother's Day

Mother's Day Weekend in Pictures

How stressful is raising your child?

Every time we go to the doctors office we get a little sheet to fill out. They ask questions like can your child count to 10, do they know their alphabet,  do they use good eye contact,  etc....then there is that one question that you know they aren't screening your child they are screening you...the mother.....

HOW STRESSFUL IS RAISING YOUR CHILD?

I am preparing for this question for Monday. The only problem is I don't know that the nurse practitioner is prepared for the answer. I am already envisioning me having a total breakdown at the doctors office crying, huge tears just streaming down my face... very similar to the breakdown I just had in the van driving home from Cedar Falls.

All I can say is some days are stressful. .....very very stressful!

I feel like everyday is stressful when you are raising kids. Some days are just less stressful then others.  Being a Mother is hard work!!! Raising my daughters is the most Important job I have ever had. I want to raise them to be followers of Christ, to love others, to choose amazing husbands like their own daddy, and to love each other because they are sisters who will always be there for each other.

So what do I find stressful about that?  I am scared, scared I will screw it up, screw them up. 

So here I fall on my knees and Pray tears falling, giving it to God!

I'm Not 21 and I'm not 60

This is really just more like a pitty party so read along if you want, but just warning you ahead of time. :)

I turned 29 in April, I have 3 kids, and I am completely exhausted about 98 percent of the time. I usually have an hour or two during the day that I feel pretty good. But after that I am just tired. I am considering I need my thyroid checked but I think I've decided it's just my age.
I am no longer 21, I have responsibilities like a job and kids, a house to take care of, bills to pay, and my metabolism no longer lets me eat whatever I want.

But all this has put me in a funk. I don't feel all that great about myself.  I haven't had a hair cut since October partly because I am growing it out,  but also I don't have the time,  and I don't want to pay the money. Same reason I haven't got my eyebrows waxed.

I've started wearing make-up more but really it's just not me I would rather spend an extra 10 minutes in bed then take the time to do make-up. Plus I don't really know how.

And the clothing option well that's where it about puts me over the edge to complete funk. I try to go shopping with the little money I have and this is what I find it's either hey I am 21 and like to party or I am 60 headed to a retirement party. I can't seem to find that happy medium of hey I am a mom, and I am professional but I still have some style. I look around and a lot of my mom friends still got it.... for some reason I don't. I end up throwing on the same ol' sweatshirt with the same ol' jeans put my hair in the same ol' pony tail and out the door I go. Then I look around and wonder....why can't I have cute clothes? Then I start to get down on myself and I start to have my pitty party. But my question is this why? Who am I trying to impress?  And why do I care if you're not impressed?

The answer to this is as women we're always trying to impress other women. This is absolutely ridiculous!!
There is really only one earthly person that I should care about impressing and his name is Brandon. I call him my husband and he is who I should want to impress. 

Now not every husband or guy is the same they all find different things attractive but here is when Brandon tells me I am beautiful the most.....(Brandon can correct me if I am wrong) but it's when I am wearing a carhart coat with a pair of work boots and I am outside getting dirty.

So while I still want to find a style. I need to remind myself....who am I trying to impress?

May 5th

Friday we had a historical snow fall of almost a foot of snow on the ground.

Today, Sunday we had the most beautiful weather.  Brandon mowed the lawn for the first time.  Teagan scored a goal at her soccer game, we played at the park and now we are outside enjoying the last minutes of daylight.

Now this is what May should be about!

May 3rd and it's still snowing! !

May 3rd and it's still snowing!!!

I was expecting a dusting not an actual snow fall. But last night I woke up to our power going in and out and looked out to find even more snow had fallen and still going!

I have a co-worker who planned an outdoor wedding this weekend.  Who would have guessed you would have to worry about snow??!!

The girls are enjoying it and surprisingly Rudy Paws is too. Even with his new summer buzz.

The rain has not started and I am confident all this snow will be gone by tomorrow and by next week when it is 68 degrees this will all just seem like a crazy dream!!

I am ready to go back to taking pictures of green grass, dirty feet, swinging, and riding bikes!! WHERE IS SPRING??